Author: Ronnie J

Have you ever added a new person on Facebook and felt proud? Like you’re achieving something? Like you’re actually a social person with a large social network? Here’s a truth: your Facebook friend count is meaningless. Facebook friends don’t count as real friends. And you want real friend. Before Facebook existed, people had friends. Real friends. And that count is what you should be focused on….

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It’s Friday. You hear your classmates or coworkers talking about what they’re going to do this weekend. You can’t help but eavesdrop. You hear about their exciting plans. And then you think about your own: you have none. That night, you’re home alone. You’ve got no one to keep you company. No one to call. No one to text. Maybe you decide to call your…

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Fear and anxieties are negative emotions that have a very strong influence on our behaviors. They keep us safe, but sometimes, they can hinder us. I met a man who grew up in South Korea after the Korean War. Today, South Korea is a wealthy country with a tremendous human capital and electronics industries. Back after the war however, South Korea was in ruins and…

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In this first in a series called “Ask Ronnie J,” I am going to answer questions passed my way. “I find myself feeling stuck at parties talking to some people. I try to be polite, smile, and pretend to enjoy the conversation, but they keep talking. How can I get out of a conversation with someone who I don’t want to talk to anymore?”  You’ve been reading books…

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This is a talk. An important one. It’s probably something that might come across in a talk with a mental health professional when going through Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. The greatest struggle of those with social issues, and these include deep shyness, social anxiety, social anxiety disorder, social ineptitude, general lack of social skills and impaired development, is that you have a very low self-image. You…

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Social anxiety disorder has a harsh effect. The graph below shows a generalized view of social development in 2 groups of people: 1, normal people and 2, people with social anxiety disorder.     We all start at zero social skills. In fact, for the early stages of our lives, we humans do nothing but sleep, poop, eat, and cry. As we enter into school, that…

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One major issue for people with social anxiety disorder is that they there are cognitive symptoms; their thoughts and mind is negatively affected by social anxiety disorder. People with social anxiety disorders will have a negative inner voice, which I like to call the “Negative Cheerleader.” While a cheerleader says positive and encouraging statements, the Negative Cheerleader says negative discouraging statements. This not only affects people with social…

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Are you shy? Introverted? What’s the difference? The Definition of an Introvert Intraversion is personality trait that is marked by reserved behavior and enjoyment of reflecting on a person’s personal thoughts (a marked trait by both the Myers-Brigg Type Indicator and Big-Five Model). The dictionary defines it as 1. a shy person. 2. Psychology. a person characterized by concern primarily with his or her own thoughts and feelings….

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We all feel anxious around new people and in new social situations. That’s normal. Just think of the last time you moved to a new city or school. Or went on a first date. A bit of anxiety is normal in all those cases. But when our anxieties in these social situations become debilitating or we start to avoid social situations as a response to the…

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  Stranger Acquaintance Friend Good friend Let’s talk about interactions with these people.   Stranger A stranger is a person you don’t know or have never met before. You may know of this person because you two have mutual friends or classes or work at the same place, but you two are still strangers. Interactions: you may or may not say “hi” when you pass…

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